So, today is the last day of August. Tomorrow is September 1. Five years ago I would have said September was my favorite month. Now it's just a bitter sweet month that I dread as well as look forward to.
The sweet part of September is that both mine and my mother's birthdays are in September. It's the beginning of fall which is my favorite season. When I was in school I enjoyed returning to school for the new year.
The bitter part is that my sister Tayna's birthday was September 1, and the anniversary of her death is September 6. It has been four years since her accident yet most days it seems like yesterday that she was taken from us. She was my best friend. We did almost everything together once I became an adult. She was 9 years older than me, so as a child she was always a mother figure to me. I still remember the french fries she would make for me. She would cut them into the shape of a smiley face.
I remember the first time I saw Michael Jackson's Thriller. I used to sleep with my mom and my sister said she would flush the toilet to let me know it was on so I could sneak out of the bed since my mom didn't want me to watch it LOL My sister was a HUGE Michael Jackson fan, which in turn made me one as well.
Though I know her memory lives on through her two children as well as in my spirit, I still feel cheated. I feel let down. My life has been forever changed and not for the better. Yes, her death has made me a nicer person, a more understanding and patient person. But is has also made me a sheltered person. I shelter my feelings because I still don't know how to process it. This may sound crazy because it's four years later, but I am still processing losing my sister. Is this something you ever get over? I don't think it is.
Tomorrow September 1, 2010 would have been her 40th birthday. If she were still here we would be partying like it was 1999. Instead all I can do is remember the birthdays I did get to share with her and hope that one day our paths will cross again.
Tuesday, August 31, 2010
Wednesday, August 25, 2010
Hair Should be FUN
Recently I read an article in Essence magazine about a model with natural hair (I can't remember her name). The article was detailing her journey as an African American model and her transition to natural hair. She discussed the difficulties she's had with stylists on set, and her thoughts on styling her own hair. The one thing that stuck out to me was when she said that hair should not be a chore, but it should be fun.
I'll have to be honest, I hate washing my own hair. Of course I do it, but I do think of it as a chore. I have never liked washing or perming or twisting or whatever I was doing at the time, on my own hair. I'd much rather have someone else do it. Why is this? I think it comes from me never seeing my mom do her own hair. She NEVER washes her own hair. She is at the salon getting it done every other week, sometimes if she had the extra money she would go weekly.
I do remember a time when I was in high school where my hair didn't seem so much like a chore. I think that was the time I was really starting to notice boys! So you know I had to be on point with my looks, you know how teenage girls are LOL I would wake up at 6:00 every morning to glue in some tracks, put a few curls here and there, or pin up a ponytail, and back then we didn't have the ready made phony ponies we actually had to take the tracks and create our own ponytails...whew memories!
I would use spray dye to color my hair, my curling or flat irons were always in use. I'm not really sure where I lost the zest for switching up my hair styles. I think once I entered the 9-5 world my time became shorter and I just wanted to do what was quick and easy. This is probably why when I was perming my hair I wore a wrap daily, and as a natural I mainly wear my fro pulled back.
Since my birthday is nearing (September 18), I have decided to challenge myself and put the FUN back into my hair routine. I am going to rock a new style each week for the next month. I will post a picture of my new styles each week so that you all will know I'm serious. Anyone else want to join me? You can email pictures of your hair to: naturalmommy1@gmail.com and I will post your pictures along with mine.
Ok so I'm off to YouTube to find some hair videos. Stay tuned!
I'll have to be honest, I hate washing my own hair. Of course I do it, but I do think of it as a chore. I have never liked washing or perming or twisting or whatever I was doing at the time, on my own hair. I'd much rather have someone else do it. Why is this? I think it comes from me never seeing my mom do her own hair. She NEVER washes her own hair. She is at the salon getting it done every other week, sometimes if she had the extra money she would go weekly.
I do remember a time when I was in high school where my hair didn't seem so much like a chore. I think that was the time I was really starting to notice boys! So you know I had to be on point with my looks, you know how teenage girls are LOL I would wake up at 6:00 every morning to glue in some tracks, put a few curls here and there, or pin up a ponytail, and back then we didn't have the ready made phony ponies we actually had to take the tracks and create our own ponytails...whew memories!
I would use spray dye to color my hair, my curling or flat irons were always in use. I'm not really sure where I lost the zest for switching up my hair styles. I think once I entered the 9-5 world my time became shorter and I just wanted to do what was quick and easy. This is probably why when I was perming my hair I wore a wrap daily, and as a natural I mainly wear my fro pulled back.
Since my birthday is nearing (September 18), I have decided to challenge myself and put the FUN back into my hair routine. I am going to rock a new style each week for the next month. I will post a picture of my new styles each week so that you all will know I'm serious. Anyone else want to join me? You can email pictures of your hair to: naturalmommy1@gmail.com and I will post your pictures along with mine.
Ok so I'm off to YouTube to find some hair videos. Stay tuned!
Tuesday, August 24, 2010
Taking Care of Our Faces
As women, well not just women but people in general, we need to be aware of what we do to our skin because it is the largest organ in our bodies. Our faces especially, since this part of our body is always exposed. Our faces are exposed to the sun, dust particles in the air, the oil our bodies naturally create, etc. Because of this we need to wash our faces twice a day as well as moisturize twice a day. We also need to exfoliate our faces at least once a week. Another tip that most Black women overlook is to make sure that our moisturizer has an SPF of at least 15, don't count on our melanin to keep the wrinkles and sun damage away!
Not only is it good to wash our faces daily, but we should also get facials. This is an extremely important part of maintaining facial health (did I just make up a word?) you should have a licensed esthetician evaluate your face, its pores and its overall general health at least once per month, twice if you can afford it.
I know that a trip to the spa is not always affordable. A facial can cost anywhere from $55-over $100 depending on the treatment you want, but hey ladies, aren't we worth it? Isn't the health of our skin worth it? I don't know about you but I don't want to look older than my age, I don't want to have blotchy skin, I want my skin to always be radiant.
If you can't afford a trip to the spa, then definitely invest in a quality facial scrub. There are many on the market. Or you can add some baking soda to your facial cleanser and scrub, scrub, scrub. You can always search for homemade facial products and start making them at home. It doesn't matter what you use, just use something.
Another thing we need to remember is that what we put into our bodies affects the way the outside of our bodies look. So please ladies drink your water, eat your fruit and veggies. Try to stay away from too much processed foods. Buy meat from grass fed animals whenever possible to avoid the excess hormones that some farmers use to mass produce meat. Make sure that you are having regular bowel movements so that all that waste doesn't stay in your body and affect your skin.
There are many things we can do to maintain that healthy and radiant glow. I just hope we are all conscious about the importance of taking care of this particular part of our bodies. Afterall, isn't your face generally the first thing someone sees?
Not only is it good to wash our faces daily, but we should also get facials. This is an extremely important part of maintaining facial health (did I just make up a word?) you should have a licensed esthetician evaluate your face, its pores and its overall general health at least once per month, twice if you can afford it.
I know that a trip to the spa is not always affordable. A facial can cost anywhere from $55-over $100 depending on the treatment you want, but hey ladies, aren't we worth it? Isn't the health of our skin worth it? I don't know about you but I don't want to look older than my age, I don't want to have blotchy skin, I want my skin to always be radiant.
If you can't afford a trip to the spa, then definitely invest in a quality facial scrub. There are many on the market. Or you can add some baking soda to your facial cleanser and scrub, scrub, scrub. You can always search for homemade facial products and start making them at home. It doesn't matter what you use, just use something.
Another thing we need to remember is that what we put into our bodies affects the way the outside of our bodies look. So please ladies drink your water, eat your fruit and veggies. Try to stay away from too much processed foods. Buy meat from grass fed animals whenever possible to avoid the excess hormones that some farmers use to mass produce meat. Make sure that you are having regular bowel movements so that all that waste doesn't stay in your body and affect your skin.
There are many things we can do to maintain that healthy and radiant glow. I just hope we are all conscious about the importance of taking care of this particular part of our bodies. Afterall, isn't your face generally the first thing someone sees?
Thursday, August 19, 2010
Welcome to the South Side, My Side
WOW is sometimes the only word I can use to explain my side of town. I see everything from homelessness to people rolling around in BMW's and everything in between. When I first moved to Chicago in 2000 I definitely had a culture shock to say the least. So many Black people in one area was a bit overwhelming for me. Now some may read this and go HMMM but I come from the Quad Cities and there you are lucky to see a Black person outside of a five block radius most days. So coming from that to the south side of Chicago which has the largest Black population in one area in the country is just overwhelmingly amazing.
The south side often gets a bad rep because of the high crime rate, but what I say to that is HELLO, we live in the third largest city in the United States (http://www.infoplease.com/ipa/A0763098.html#axzz0x4dSqRNT) and we have a high poverty rate, so crime is definitely going to happen. That being said, I think the news makes my side of town seem worse than what it is. You're not going to get shot or robbed as soon as you step out of your car (unless you're wearing a Cubs hat!) LOL
The south side has so much to offer. Take a ride down Stony Island and be treated by the awesome landscaping that runs down the center divider. Visit the South Shore neighborhood and relax at the beach or visit the Cultural Center to take a dance class or golf lessons. Cruise down King Drive to see the beautifully built buildings that have been in existence since Chicago has been on the map. Visit Hyde Park which is the most diverse neighborhood in Chicago, and enjoy a nice walk down 53rd street for shopping, eating, or just a relaxing stroll.
There is so much culture on the south side. You can ride down 47th, 79th or 87th streets and see a variety of mom and pop shops, clothing boutiques, African American book stores, and the abundant hair salons that stay jam packed from morning till the wee hours of the night. Not to mention the always stylish brothas and sistas that stay fly with the latest fashion trends!
Visit one of the many parks on a sunny Saturday to really get a taste of how we do it. You'll see multiple families out enjoying a bbq and you can always count on someone setting up a tent with turntables to give everyone something to jam to. There's the Bud Biliken parade down King Drive, there's the Old School picnic in Jackson Park, the Jazz Festival at the Cultural Center, and how could I dare forget the Chicago White Sox!!!
Welcome to the south side, my side.
SOUTH SIIIIDDDDEEEE!!!
The south side often gets a bad rep because of the high crime rate, but what I say to that is HELLO, we live in the third largest city in the United States (http://www.infoplease.com/ipa/A0763098.html#axzz0x4dSqRNT) and we have a high poverty rate, so crime is definitely going to happen. That being said, I think the news makes my side of town seem worse than what it is. You're not going to get shot or robbed as soon as you step out of your car (unless you're wearing a Cubs hat!) LOL
The south side has so much to offer. Take a ride down Stony Island and be treated by the awesome landscaping that runs down the center divider. Visit the South Shore neighborhood and relax at the beach or visit the Cultural Center to take a dance class or golf lessons. Cruise down King Drive to see the beautifully built buildings that have been in existence since Chicago has been on the map. Visit Hyde Park which is the most diverse neighborhood in Chicago, and enjoy a nice walk down 53rd street for shopping, eating, or just a relaxing stroll.
There is so much culture on the south side. You can ride down 47th, 79th or 87th streets and see a variety of mom and pop shops, clothing boutiques, African American book stores, and the abundant hair salons that stay jam packed from morning till the wee hours of the night. Not to mention the always stylish brothas and sistas that stay fly with the latest fashion trends!
Visit one of the many parks on a sunny Saturday to really get a taste of how we do it. You'll see multiple families out enjoying a bbq and you can always count on someone setting up a tent with turntables to give everyone something to jam to. There's the Bud Biliken parade down King Drive, there's the Old School picnic in Jackson Park, the Jazz Festival at the Cultural Center, and how could I dare forget the Chicago White Sox!!!
Welcome to the south side, my side.
SOUTH SIIIIDDDDEEEE!!!
Tuesday, August 10, 2010
Losing Weight
Why is losing weight so hard? I have been trying to lose these same 25-30 pounds since before my daughter was born. So for the last four years, I have been saying I'm going to lose 25-30 pounds. It's about time I stop saying that LOL
This summer I challenged myself to work out regularly and watch my calories. Just work out 5 times a day and don't overeat, that doesn't sound too hard... Then why is it so hard? It sure isn't that hard to drive to McDonald's and order a quarter pounder with cheese value meal, so why is it so hard to order a salad from the same place?
So, the summer is almost over and I have only managed to lose and regain the same four pounds. I have managed, however to tone up a bit and increase my stamina. These are two things I am proud of, though I could have done better.
I joined a challenge on my favorite dieting website, www.sparkpeople.com, to lose 10 lbs during the month of August. This is definitely an attainable goal, as long as I keep myself in check, which is the hard part. This is day 10 of the challenge and so far so good. I will be keeping all of you updated on my progress, 10 pounds is a whole clothing size!!!! If anyone wants to join me just shoot me an email, NaTuRalMommy1@gmail.com and we can encourage each other!
This summer I challenged myself to work out regularly and watch my calories. Just work out 5 times a day and don't overeat, that doesn't sound too hard... Then why is it so hard? It sure isn't that hard to drive to McDonald's and order a quarter pounder with cheese value meal, so why is it so hard to order a salad from the same place?
So, the summer is almost over and I have only managed to lose and regain the same four pounds. I have managed, however to tone up a bit and increase my stamina. These are two things I am proud of, though I could have done better.
I joined a challenge on my favorite dieting website, www.sparkpeople.com, to lose 10 lbs during the month of August. This is definitely an attainable goal, as long as I keep myself in check, which is the hard part. This is day 10 of the challenge and so far so good. I will be keeping all of you updated on my progress, 10 pounds is a whole clothing size!!!! If anyone wants to join me just shoot me an email, NaTuRalMommy1@gmail.com and we can encourage each other!
Monday, August 9, 2010
Kitchen Dance
She's potty trained, she can speak in sentences that I understand...you know we are communicating on a mommy and tot level LOL So just when I think it's safe to say things are going smoothly, here comes "I don't want to eat that" OMG no one told me the child would refuse to EAT! Now what am I supposed to do?
The Dr says make sure she gets her vitamins (check), make sure she is drinking milk since she'll drink anything (check), and try to be patient (...) We're still working on that one most days! So, I buy her the PediaSure so she'll at least get SOME nutrients in her little body.
She will eat pizza, french fries, pancakes, and turkey sausage on a pretty regular basis. She loves yogurt and cheese so that's good. Spaghetti used to be my go to meal but NOPE not anymore. Now it's Pizza because I can hide other ingredients like spinach, turkey pepperoni... under the cheese LOL Needless to say, we eat a lot of Pizza!
Sometimes we have good days where she'll eat anything I give her, but then other days I'm doing the kitchen dance, as my friend Tara would say, making two meals making sure everyone eats...I'm really hoping this phase ends VERY SOON :)
The Dr says make sure she gets her vitamins (check), make sure she is drinking milk since she'll drink anything (check), and try to be patient (...) We're still working on that one most days! So, I buy her the PediaSure so she'll at least get SOME nutrients in her little body.
She will eat pizza, french fries, pancakes, and turkey sausage on a pretty regular basis. She loves yogurt and cheese so that's good. Spaghetti used to be my go to meal but NOPE not anymore. Now it's Pizza because I can hide other ingredients like spinach, turkey pepperoni... under the cheese LOL Needless to say, we eat a lot of Pizza!
Sometimes we have good days where she'll eat anything I give her, but then other days I'm doing the kitchen dance, as my friend Tara would say, making two meals making sure everyone eats...I'm really hoping this phase ends VERY SOON :)
Wednesday, August 4, 2010
favorite HAIR products
I find myself trying out different hair products all the time. I don't think I'm a full blown product junkie, but rather a semi p.j. :)
Over the years I've tried some products that make my hair feel and look horrible, like that nasty brown hair gel! But I've also tried some products that I absolutely LOVE, not only for my own hair, but also my daughter's.
My hair routine is pretty simple, co-wash and deep condition weekly. Maintain my moisture by spritzing my hair with a mixture of water and jojoba oil daily. And the times I need that added moisture I apply a little raw shea butter.
To co-wash my hair, meaning I wash my hair with conditioner only, I use VO5 Moisture Milks Conditioner. I love this conditioner because it smells good, it is great for detangling, and it leaves my hair feeling soft and smooth.
So once I'm done washing and detangling with the VO5 I apply Oyin's Handmade Honey Hemp conditioner and leave in for about 20 minutes. I love, love, love this conditioner. My hair feels so soft and fluffy after using this, and it's all natural! I also use this conditioner on my daughter's hair.
These products have been my staples for about a year now and they never fail me. I would definitely recommend this combination to anyone looking for extra moisture and manageability.
I also like these products for added moisture and shine:
Kinky Curly Knot Today leave in conditioner
Cantu Shea Butter
For washing my daughter's hair I use Oyin's Handmade Honey Wash, I have been using this in Tanya's hair since she was about one year old. It's made from all natural products so it won't irritate her skin or eyes. You can also use this as a body wash!
Finding the right hair products for your particular hair type is like hitting the lottery, it's not that easy to do but once you find the right products your hair will feel like a million bucks!
Over the years I've tried some products that make my hair feel and look horrible, like that nasty brown hair gel! But I've also tried some products that I absolutely LOVE, not only for my own hair, but also my daughter's.
My hair routine is pretty simple, co-wash and deep condition weekly. Maintain my moisture by spritzing my hair with a mixture of water and jojoba oil daily. And the times I need that added moisture I apply a little raw shea butter.
To co-wash my hair, meaning I wash my hair with conditioner only, I use VO5 Moisture Milks Conditioner. I love this conditioner because it smells good, it is great for detangling, and it leaves my hair feeling soft and smooth.
So once I'm done washing and detangling with the VO5 I apply Oyin's Handmade Honey Hemp conditioner and leave in for about 20 minutes. I love, love, love this conditioner. My hair feels so soft and fluffy after using this, and it's all natural! I also use this conditioner on my daughter's hair.
These products have been my staples for about a year now and they never fail me. I would definitely recommend this combination to anyone looking for extra moisture and manageability.
I also like these products for added moisture and shine:
Kinky Curly Knot Today leave in conditioner
Cantu Shea Butter
For washing my daughter's hair I use Oyin's Handmade Honey Wash, I have been using this in Tanya's hair since she was about one year old. It's made from all natural products so it won't irritate her skin or eyes. You can also use this as a body wash!
Finding the right hair products for your particular hair type is like hitting the lottery, it's not that easy to do but once you find the right products your hair will feel like a million bucks!
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